I put the finishing touches on a self portrait today. The last time I could stand looking at myself that long was 30 years ago. I was 30 years old then (you do the math). For my age I don't look too bad, kind of gnarly though. In the background of this current painting is the very same portrait I did so many years ago. It will also be in our current show. It's a very good painting and I find myself wondering, "Of course it's very different, but is it any better?"
Technically, there is a world of difference. The earlier work is done "Alla Prima" - all at once. The paint is laid down with total self-assurance. The current painting is done with glazes, scumbles and layers upon layers of the thinnest color, this painting will never be cleaned, it's too fragile.
I think as I get older I can afford to fret more, doubt more, improvise more than I could have tolerated as a young artist, or as a young man for that matter. A little older, a little more confused. There is one thing I'm very clear about; my passionate feelings for art have never changed. Our show; PAINT, PAPER, CLAY, WAX, WOOD is, for me, tying up loose ends, settling accounts, reckoning the score while I prepare for my next thirty years in art.
Adrian
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